Well, None of my money is mine... yet.

One of our best friends just got dumped.  Like, dropped on his ass out of nowhere, dumped.  He's handling it very well, I will say that.  He's such an amazing guy, and I'm not one to forget your flaws when it comes to relationships.  Relationships are hard.  It's best not to pretend like everything's hunky-doory when friends come to you with relationship woes, that doesn't help anyone.  The other party can't always be at fault.  

That being said, he's well rounded, holds a steady job to support himself and have enough money to do fun things he wants to do.  And! He is just about the funniest, most considerate, sweetest guy I've ever met, to boot.  I mean, for crying out loud.  It's January 25th and he already had her Valentine's Day gift ready to go.  You can't go wrong here.  I'm even leaving out that he's adorable in all the hottest ways possible.

I know I'm just singing the praises of someone you don't know.  But he is awesome.  This is the kind of guy who will fly across the country on his own dime to help you move back home after a failed relationship. 

And time after time, he finds these girls who... just aren't worthy of the kind of admiration he's willing to dole out.  This most recent one not escaping that mold.  She seemed awesome.  Liked the things he liked, smart, and pretty to boot! 

But... 

She's from old Money.  The kind of Money that would make Steve Jobs blush.  The kind of Money that's capitalized and NOT on credit cards (see picture of all of my "money"--lowercase.)

This past week, he traveled to visit her.  Took the girl and her mother out to lunch. Needless to say... Mom didn't like him.  She talked, and he just... took it, like you do when the mother of the girl you're wooing is laying into you.  

Fast forward to the end of the weekend.  He comes back to Atlanta, everything picks up where it left off.  Then out of the blue she calls, tells him "it's over, I can't do this anymore, we're done" and hangs up the phone.   Nothing else.  No elaboration. 

That's just cold.  A clean break is one thing.  But... damn.   Her friends say her family pressured her into it.  One even said he was better off.  That her mother would have made him miserable until he ran away with his tail between his legs, anyway.  

I know parents are hard to please.  I know that there are social obligations for some people.  Hell, Renee (who's blog I LOVE, sorry to single you out) has alluded briefly to what I assume is something of a "higher class" lifestyle, and I can appreciate that it's different.  There's something more to deal with than just your run of the mill relationship issues.  However, DAMN.  Let a guy down easy!

I guess her parents just want her to have everything.  But everything doesn't include a great man or a backbone when it comes to family.  

So... who's single?!

The Spanish Armada

Without further ado, a tail from the life and times of Kyle:

A quick disclaimer: I never would have believed this story had it not been confirmed by Kyle's best friend in Boston, who happens to be an awesome Chickadee who wouldn't lie to me.

This past halloween my brother threw a party for his apartment building.  He lives in one of those fancy brownstone communities somewhere near what's called "the backbay area"  If you've ever been to boston for a length of time, someone probably made you go there, honestly I couldn't tell you anything about it, except that Kyle lives there and you can see the baseball stadium from his apartment.

Anyway, his building houses 4 apartments and they consider their 10- 15 neighboring brownstones to all be in the same "complex" for lack of a better term.  In a classic Kyle maneuver, he invited 40 households of people, most of whom he's never met and are probably in their late 30s early 40s with 2.7 toddlers and 1.5 dogs.

The big night shows, the boys have decorated their apartment, gotten out all their "scary" crap and halloween themed-booze.  Luckily someone's girlfriend was there so that there would be food along with the booze.  I love my brother, but he's not the best at parties (implied: commonsense), and neither are his roommates. Typical Musicians.  

As the guests start arriving, all of his friends arrive soon followed by 25 miscellaneous 20-27 year old Hispanic women.

In Kyle's own words, "It's like we hit the motherload! But none of us could figure out where the rabbit hole was!  And man.  We HAD to find that rabbit hole again!"

Turns out Kyle and his roommates invited all of their neighbors nannies without realizing.  Only he could have that luck.  Any other normal human being would have ended up with a house full of middle aged men, but not Kyle. 

My brother proceeds to seduce "The Spanish Armada" (I'm about 100% sure they were all from Latin/South America, but with Kyle apparently speaking spanish makes you Spanish) with songs and jokes out on the balcony.  From his retelling the 4 he focused on (yeah... FOUR... again, confirmed) were totally into him; falling all over him, stroking his arm etc. etc.

In the end he made out with two, "hooked up with" (can someone define that?!) another and ended up getting all of their phone numbers.  

Unfortunately all four of them also got his number.  Because Kyle's a little 'tarded.   For 3 weeks he got love texts and flirtations from these girls at all hours of the night and day.  Two of the girls (probably the two he made out with but didn't "hook up" with) apparently could see his apartment from their places and would text him whenever he left the building.  

"If there's one thing I've learned,"  he told me at Christmas, "It's that you don't mess with the Spanish Navy.  They are bat-shit crazy."